Hopeful

I feel a little bit like the time traveler's wife these days. I know that Tracy's time in Afghanistan is drawing to a close, and I know that he is thinking about me as much as I am thinking about him. It's as though, if I close my eyes and don't move, I can feel his presence so strongly that I almost expect him to appear...I can almost feel his hand against my back...it is overwhelming, sensing him so near to me, but knowing that he is so far away.

There is no doubt that the past year has taken a toll on both of us, though in different ways. I am starting to feel a little out of control, strung a little too tightly. I think it's just the fact that I know it will all be over soon. All the emotion that I haven't been able to express - the fear, the loneliness, the worry - everything that I have had to hold back just to make it through each day - that dam won't hold forever, and the cracks are starting to show.

I just can't wait to have my family back, and the love of my life beside me again; he's been there in my heart all along.